Wednesday, May 26, 2010

The cranky old cat lady, minus the cats.

I hate marriage.
The whole idea of it.
I also never want kids.
No snotty nosed munchkins coming outta this womb.
Uh-uh. No way.
I'm content with being an aunt.
As long as I can hand the child back, I'm ok with it.
I don't want pets.
Cats hate me, fish freak me out, and rabbits are dull.
Dogs are chill, but they shed and you have to potty train.
Eeeww.
No, thank you.
As I see it, I am going to be a crazed, workaholic old cat lady, minus the cats.
And I'm ok with that.
I like my life.
I don't need men, animals, or little brats to complete me.
As long as I have books and friends,
I'll be just fine.


Sunday, May 23, 2010

Let's take this one step at a time.

Small steps.
One foot after another.
Change is slow.
Change is good.
Baby steps.

I'm honestly, truely ready to change my life.
It's gonna be a slow transition, but I'm ready to be a better me.
First up, goodbye Facebook. I'm deactivating my account on Tuesday.
I miss actually communicating with people.
I was reading Stephanie's blog when I stumbled upon another one. I can't remember the name or the link, but I remember the post.
It was about communication. Technology has made it too easy to disappear from human contact.
We text our friends to keep in touch.
We Facebook to pretend to hold on to relationships.
What happened to snail mail and phone calls?
I'm saying bye-bye to Facebook (although it may be temporary due to friends going out of state and out of country).
I'm hoping to cut back on my texting, but who knows.
Baby steps.

This summer, phase 2 begins.
I'm joining a gym, hopefully 24-hr fitness. I might try to have one or two sessions with a personal trainer to get me started, but it all depends on price.
I want to work out daily. I need to get in shape.
My goal is to walk a marathon for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society Fall 2011.
I want to have a way to release anger and stress that's healthy for me.
It will be nice to get back into a healthy daily routine, balancing school, work, and exercise.

Phase three is already in progress (yes I know, out of order) because of my current roommate. We are both trying to eat healthier. Ash makes me dinner, and it's always a healthy balanced meal. She reminds me to eat breakfast, and Gen makes me eat lunch. (Otherwise I'll forget to eat!).
I am considering signing up for CSA, but I need to talk to my next roommate about it. I am willing to pay more for organic, healthy foods. I tried eating a Twinkie awhile ago, and gagged on the greasy nastiness of it.

Phase four is also in progress, and has always been. However, I want to tweak it a bit. It's reading, and educating myself. I've always been an avid reader, dying to get my hands on new books. I have a list of books I want to read or reread this summer, along with three or four summer classes (depending on if I can get into chemistry). I am bound and determined to continue learning, possibly even teaching myself a new language. I have several languages I want to be able to speak, even if only the survival phrases.

Here's my life plan (well, for the next few months anyways.)
What about you?
Any ideas or plans to better yourself? I'd love to hear them!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

That's what the chickens say...

There's nothing like a good tumble down the stairs to cheer you up.

That is, if you're me.

Crazy drama everywhere, pet peeve being exploited to the Nth degree, and stress everywhere.

Most people would rant, rave, cry, scream, write out their frustration, etc.

Not me.

My stress relief was an accident.

All I did was walk into work.

My heels hit the stairs, stuck, and down I went.

The people in the room at the bottom of the stairs heard a lovely *thump thump* "Shit! Goddamnit!" *thump thump*.

Then, suddenly, a bubble of laughter burst out of me.

Here I was, 18 years old, and I couldn't even walk down a flight of stairs.

Honestly, it was the best thing to ever happen to me.

I realized how ridiculous my life had become.

I laughed at my arrogant, dramatic self, and how I had been acting.

Who cares?

Seriously. So people are annoying right now. Some may still need to grow up.

So you lost out on one life choice. You ended up with a better one!

(I seriously think the people downstairs think I'm nuts)

Now?

I can laugh it off.

Today, I got annoyed and pissed off. One look at my knees and pinkie missing chunks of skin, and I busted up again.

My new philosophy on Life?

No Matter What, Laugh.

Laughter is my cure. My love. My everything.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Life.

"We know you work all the time, so we don't want to bug you with an invitation."

um, ouch.

Have you ever been running around,
so busy all the time,
that you see the blurs of others,
 but think you are alone?

Welcome to hell week.

I'm taking nineteen credits (yikes) and working twenty plus hours a week. I can't drop all of my responsibilities and run away from my problems at the last minute. I don't have time for silly games.

I love my hectic life. Yes, I realize it sounds crazy, but I've always loved learning. I love to read, i love discovering, and if it was free, I would stay a student forever. I like to be around realistic people like me, and I won't shut up if someone doesn't like the way I think.

I made a few big changes this past month. I grew up. I'm not a grown-up entirely yet, but I'm done wasting my time. I have dreams and goals I would like to achieve, and I can't let pettiness stand in my way. I can't let others hold me back from what I want to do.

I'm not the most driven person in the world. Yes, I set goals and strive to achieve them, but I am okay with not being a 4.0 student. I know that the grades I earn are important, but the 10% difference between a B and an A is never going to effect my life. I don't stress over losing a couple of points. I work hard, and I know I deserve whatever grade I recieve.

I've been dealing with a few issues, but I'm letting go of them right....now. Done. I don't have the time to worry about little things, and I can't handle drama. I won't. So, they're forgotten. I've moved on.

School? I love it. I'm the nerd who loves to learn. I like attending class every day, and I don't know what to do without a scheduled day.

AS for this blog?

I don't care if anyone reads it. (Thanks for the support, Mom). I don't need people to comment, and I don't feel like anyone to care too terribly much about what happens on a daily basis in my life. I write this simply because I'm better at typing than I am at handwriting, and it doesn't clog up memory space on my computer.

I love my life. Don't change that.